JP: Raymond Roadrunner vs. Wiley Coyote
This is a practically true story. The story is about a young boy named Rav whose tickets were stolen by Raymond Roadrunner. ‘Come back here Raymond Roadrunner, come back with my tickets!’ Said the boy.
‘Beep beep’ said the Roadrunner. I quickly used google translate (Roadrunner to English) to understand what the Roadrunner said, and this is what he said , ‘Not a chance little boy, I’m about to go jump through a portal to get me to the desert of Utah, so it will be impossible to catch me before I get to the stadium.’ Said Raymond the Roadrunner.
‘Calling agent Wiley’ said the boy (dah, dah, duuh dah dah – theme music).
‘What is it Rav?’, said Wiley Coyote.
‘That evil road runner has stolen my tickets, and it will be your job to stop him. He went into a portal all the way down to the Utah desert. You have the advantage by the mountain, use it well! (theme music, dah dah, duh dah dah)
‘So, I have an advantage’ said Wiley Coyote, ‘better get a move on it.’
Wiley jumped through the portal and landed in the desert near the Roadrunner.
‘Beep beep’ said Raymond Roadrunner as he was running. The google translator said that meant, ‘here is my ticket to the concert, there should be a tunnel through the mountain, just about there…’
Meanwhile, up on the mountain Wiley Coyote had just spray-painted a tunnel archway on the Rocky Mountains. ‘There is my trap, now for the prize’ said Wiley.
‘And there is the road runner’ said Wiley, grinning.
The road runner ran straight through the tunnel.
‘What!’ said Wiley, ‘that defies the laws of physics!
‘Beep beep,’ said the roadrunner as he whooshed past Wiley.
Wiley just looked sad, then he heard ‘Beep beep’ again. But this time the beeping was from an 18 wheeler.
Boom, crash. Wiley was smashed flat. The truck went right through the tunnel.
‘Okay,’ said Wiley as he came back to life, this time I’ve got a hang glider on my side. And off he went…jumping of the mountain with the glider.
After an amazingly long glide, Wiley said to himself ‘Wheee, there is the stadium’ and he landed gently on the roof. ‘Not exactly where I intended to land, but I can still stadium dive.’
The roadrunner was just about at the ticket gate, he was a little early and the show had not started yet.
‘Bombs away roadrunner’ cried Wiley as he dove down the building.
‘Ooops, he got through, and there are the fireworks’ said Wiley.
The fireworks were lined up in boxes beside the stadium waiting to be used.
The road runner threw a lit match and it landed in Wiley’s hand.
‘Beep beep’ said the roadrunner as Wiley dropped the hot match and watched it fall onto the fireworks.
Well, Wiley Coyote got to see an early fireworks display. It was quite a show, watched by the Roadrunner, with Wiley blasted through the ring of fire for an early Finale. Fortunately there were extra fireworks, and there is still time left for me to find tickets.
And that’s why I think you should give me the tickets, because Raymond the Roadrunner took my tickets, and Wiley Coyote went to all that trouble to get them back for me, but obviously he was not very successful.
That’s all folks!